KING DAVID AS A FATHER
David, the son of Jesse, wore a lot of different hats in his lifetime. He was a shepherd, armor-bearer and harp player for King Saul, soldier, king, prophet of Jehovah, husband, and father. While each of his roles had its distinct challenges, surely nothing was more challenging to him than being a dad. As a parent, David showed some traits that are worthy of imitation, but he also demonstrated serious flaws that we would do well to avoid. Consider these brief observations on King David as a father.
David did not properly restrain and discipline his sons. When David’s son Amnon raped his sister Tamar, David “was very wroth” (2 Samuel 13:21), but there is no indication in the Bible that he did anything about it. Later, we read that when David’s son Adonijah tried to steal his father’s throne, David “had not displeased [rebuked, NKJV] him at any time” (1 Kings 1:6). Tolerance and lack of discipline helped corrupt David’s family. Remember Eli’s failure to properly restrain his sons (1 Samuel 3:13).
David showed favoritism toward one of his sons. David had a slew of children, but he made it no secret that Absalom was “Daddy’s boy.” Jacob had made the same mistake in loving Joseph more than his other sons. David’s elevated affection for Absalom hurt David’s family, his reputation, and adversely affected the nation. Are we listening?
David endured the pain of having a son turn against him. That son was Absalom, the very one whom David loved so much! Absalom led a revolt against David and his kingship, causing David to flee from Jerusalem. Absalom made his choices of his own free will, but the havoc that he caused in David’s family and in the nation of Israel were, in part, a punishment for David’s sin with Bathsheba (2 Samuel 11).
David endured the pain of losing a child. No parent wants to see his/her child die, but David faced such sadness at least three times (the first son that Bathsheba bore to him, Amnon, and Absalom). To his credit, through his suffering and weakness of the flesh, David time and again turned to the Lord for strength:“In God is my salvation and my glory: the rock of my strength, and my refuge, is in God” (Psalm 62:7).
Before he died, David showed interest in his son’s project. When God made it known that He wanted Solomon, not David, to build a temple for Him, rather than pout and work against that task, David worked diligently and did all that he could to help rally the nation behind his son’s project. Wise dads today will take an interest in their children’s activities at school, in recreation, and especially in the things they do which are related to the Lord’s church.
Before he died, David gave wonderful advice and exhortation to his son Solomon. As his death approached, David told Solomon, “...be thou strong therefore, and shew thyself a man; And keep the charge of the Lord thy God, to walk in his ways ... that thou mayest prosper in all that thou doest...” (1 Kings 2:2-3). Is there anything more important that a father could express to his son?
Like the rest of us, David was flesh and bones, a mere mortal. As a father, he endured hardships, made mistakes, and did some things well. Let us learn from this famous father.