International Bible Teaching Ministries
Friends and Family
Question 1: What is the best way to let your friend know that you have committed sin?
ANSWER: If a Christian has sinned in a public way and has repented his or her confession needs to be as public as the sin. This type of confession may be expediently dealt with when the congregation is assembled. If one has sinned privately, the requirement is simply to repent and pray God (I John 1:9). How to deal with matters of personal trespass is clearly presented in Matthew 18:15-20. Certainly, all confessions of sin should be made with remorsefulness and humility, whether private or public.
Question 2: What is the significance in showing favor to a particular child as Jacob did to Joseph in our families today?
ANSWER: Each child in a family should be loved, supported and developed in the nurture and admonition of the Lord (Ephesians 6:4). Expressions of favoritism are often very destructive!
Question 3: How can I win my friends to Christ?
ANSWER: First of all, your friends must see Christ living in you. This means that your words, actions, and attitude must be consistently in harmony with the will of Christ. One cannot teach someone something that they are unwilling to do and practice. You must study the Bible so you will know what to practice and teach. Knowing what to teach, and practicing what you teach, does not mean that everyone you approach will listen or have a desire to study with you. There are different ways to approach people depending upon one’s talents. Some may successfully use a direct approach with people that they contact daily by asking Bible questions, inviting them to church services, or by forthrightly asking them to study the bible. Some begin my passing out Bible tracts or other literature that causes interest to develop. I have found it the case that each must determine the best approach for them through trial and error. It is often best to plan to approach others by pre-selecting names of individuals that you are concerned about and feel that they would be good prospects. Pray about these and then follow up on your prayer by doing the best you can until you discover the approach most suitable for you. Most often the reason we are unsuccessful is because our approach is haphazard or we quit trying when first we fail. Be patient and consistent, both in setting up and conducting Bible studies, remembering that Christ did not ask you to do something that you couldn’t do (Mark 16:15-16).
Question 4: What is the role of the husband and father in the home?
ANSWER: He is the head of the family in the same way that Christ is the head of the church. Therefore, its government is especially assigned to him (I Corinthians 11:3; Ephesians 5:22-24). However, this is not to be taken to mean that he is to be a hard taskmaster or dictator. He is to be kind and loving in his rule of the home, loving the wife with tenderness and much concern for her welfare and betterment (Ephesians 5:25, 28; Colossians 3:19; I Peter 3:7). As well, He is to bring up his children to be followers of Christ with care and concern not only for their spiritual well-being, but also for their physical sustenance (Ephesians 6:4; I Timothy 5:8). A great responsibility is placed upon the father as head of the house to guide the home through teaching, example, and practice! To fail in these matters is to fail wife, children, and God!
Question 5: What Bible verses would you recommend for me concerning my failing health that has affected my marriage?
ANSWER: Many passages would be helpful to you, but some of my favorites are: Deuteronomy 33:27; Psalms 1, 4, 8, 11, 18, 23, 27, 32, 34:15-18; 40:1-3; 46; Matthew 11:28-30; John 14:1-6; Romans 8:35-39; Hebrews 10:17; Hebrews 13:5; Revelation 21:3-7; Revelation 22:14.
Question 6: The Bible says that God hears the prayers of His people, i.e., only those who hear and believe. Why do parents tell their children to say the prayer at the time of meals? Does God hear the prayer of those children who have not become Christians?
ANSWER: The Bible, in saying that God “hears” the righteous (I Peter 3:11) and that He doesn’t “hear” sinners (Isaiah 59:1-2; John 9:31) does not mean that God is not aware of the prayer or the one praying. It simply means that God will be responsive to His children’s prayer and will not be responsive similarly to the person who has not become a child of God. For example: As a child of God, I can pray for forgiveness and God has promised to grant His forgiveness to me. A person who is not a child of God and who prays for forgiveness, cannot be forgiven until he becomes a child of God. In this sense, God does not hear his prayer and grant forgiveness that is otherwise conditional! God may hear the prayer of one who has not accepted Christ and is praying that he might be so led. For example: Cornelius was not a Christian, yet his prayers went up before God. As a result, Cornelius was led to the truth. The point is that one who is not a child of God will not be directly granted through prayer the blessings that are promised only to the faithful (Ephesians 1:3). Consider Saul of Tarsus. God was aware that he was praying (Acts 9:11), but God would not and could not wash away his sins by virtue of that prayer. In this sense He did not hear Saul. Nonetheless, he sent a preacher to him so that his sins could be removed, not by prayer, but by heaven’s conditions for forgiveness (Acts 22:16)! In all cases, prayer must be according to the will of God (James 4:3; I John 5:14). If it is not, God will be aware of the prayer (Proverbs 28:9), but He will not be responsive positively to it! In this sense, He does not “hear” prayer!
Undoubtedly one of the reasons why parents tell their little children to pray at mealtime and at bedtime is to “bring them up in the nurture and admonition of the Lord” (Ephesians 6:4). Christians parents saying the prayer along with the child (as Christians do with the prayer leader in worship), and saying “Amen” to it, evokes the requested blessings even if it were the case that God was not aware of the prayer of the child. However, I believe it in error to assume that an all-knowing God is not aware of the prayer of the little child who has not yet sinned, especially as the parents are coming before Him with the same words. There is no passage that permits such a belief. The child may not understand what he or she is saying, but certainly God is aware of the action and the words being spoken, as the parents understand them. Such a little child may pray “forgive our sins.” God being aware that the child has no sins obviously cannot render forgiveness toward the child and in this sense does not hear the child. However, the parents praying the same, but silently, will, with the request, be forgiven in accordance with God’s will.